Notes: The easy thing to say is that I haven’t being feeling myself recently. But that wouldn’t be the truth.
The harder thing to say is that I’ve been feeling like a version of myself that I hoped to never revisit. That would be more honest.
It’s progress to admit that the lack of enthusiasm I’m suffering from isn’t something that I’m just going to snap out of. It’s a shame that it took a run where I felt that I was physically falling apart to accept that I am a little psychologically fragile at the moment.
It’s a shame that I’ve been feeling like this for a few months because there are some truly wonderful things going on in my life at the moment. Important people have arrived and individuals have shown great faith in me. Perhaps it’s all too much? Perhaps I can’t accept it all at once?
Running provides me with the time to think about myself and accept difficult conclusions. It also provides me with clues as to where some of the answers might lie.
That’s why I do it. That’s why I have to try to push on when it hurts.